TorturedLadydxb

Friday, 30 March 2007

I dont want pain anymore

Pain, my heart from others can't take
Being nice with many was a mistake
Sticks & stones for my bones can break
But how i manage words that shatter my soul
How can i feel again whole,
I need someone for me to console
Let me feel back again whole,,
put all the broken pieces up again
For my heart and love maintain
From the pain i wish i can complain
From my brain i need an explain
why my smile can't remain
why their love in my heart doesn't retain
why on my thinking i dont have control
why strong i cannot be like before
why the smallest things i can't ignore
I am tired , i dont want it pain anymore

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Friday, 23 March 2007

Anger !

Gd' Morning ,
'We're an angrier nation nowadays', we cannot stand any situation no matter how big or small it is and we just find ourselves fuming at anything. Even if we encountered a little annoyance, we'll start screaming and swearing face-to-face or over the phone and the moment we put the phone down or just leave that person, we start feeling guilty AND WHY IS THAT? because we are short tempered and we cannot control it.

Never write a message while you are angry, because your angry mood is what telling you what to write, it's not you. This can really create a huge fight rather than calming it down.

'An angry person believes they must always have their way. When they don't get it, this leads to frustration' and from this comes the irrational notion because they feel that the other person is to blame for not letting them getting their way.
Some people think of it as an invasion of a space, like if you are seated alone and someone comes or phoned, your temper started to flare because you have the idea that they are pushing you, but they certainly didnot. This is because you think that the world is all about you and so if anyone interruputs that means they are pushing you. It's obvious that your belief system makes you interpret it that way. We really should not use anger as the best way for defence and try not to attach the pride in anger. like " i am not the kind of person who you shout talk to that way, you'll never get away with it" ... try just to use anger approriately and life is going to run smoothly.

Here are some tips that can help:

1) Try to change the way you think when you are angry, no one is responsible for your anger but you. We always link losing control with anger but it dosesn't have to be that way, you can get control of it by having rational thoughts.
2) Everyone has their own ideas and feelings , so it shouldn't be always your way. instead of you reacting on every word they say, try to listen carefully and respond nicely. have some tolerance that can make you more able to think why your partner is saying that and basically what the underlying cause of making him/her saying that.
3) If you have lost your temper, apologize in a sincere way and try to ask your partner of their point of view and so you can solve the problem rahter than creating a huge fight that might never end.

Have a nice lovely day full of calmness =)

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Friday, 16 March 2007

No Love to offer .. :'(

Gum3a ambarka ..
sorry but i am gona sound a little bit miserable .....
Dear Diary,
I am feeling so depressed to the extent that i do feel unable to give , i am tired from giving and getting offence and disrespect in return , i am tired from people telling me how great and amazing they are and how little i am, i know not all people are the same , but i am just tired ! i never felt the way i feel in my whole life , i do feel broken from inside , all people see me smiling and social being but i am not feeling happy , i am just tired from having some putting me down and discouraging me and it's just too hard ,, i am tired from being nice and i am tired from others telling me how being nice is awfual and i should change that , where i just wana be myself .. I dont force anyone to love or even call , and i cannot love and care about anyone if they just keep hurting me .. and the problem is that i do have a big patience but i end up then finding myself not loving .... and if i reach that level i can never love or forgive .. i dont wana hear nice words and when it comes to actions, there is no move , i want them to say things they mean it not because they can .. I dont want to love or care, life is getting so hard and i know i should be always thankful because after each hardship comes ease .. :'( i wish i can hold someone so hard and sob .......

With Regards,
Broken TL

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Thursday, 15 March 2007

Shall i call them losers !

Gd Morning,

I just had a very exhausting week that i feel thursday is the happiest day for me .. i was just telling my sis before coming to work, u know what i do feel like crying from happiness that finally it's weekend .. ;p

Okay, let's speak my mind a little ... What do you think about people who give up easily , well i call them losers because they dont spend the right amount of effort to succeed and they do work so hard in poisoining others' brain to drag them to the nothing they wana be .. but just a minute, why do we seek excellence and higher degrees if we keep nagging and nagging like old people , why do we choose that path if we dont feel able to carry on .. why do we say god this place is a rack and they dont treat their people fairly and and and and all the negatives combined ... surely there are rules and regulations in each place and we should stick to these kind of rules .. before getting there , we do know that every place works on the principle that all members should follow a certain criteria ..

I wont say that misconception and unfair treatment wont be there sometiems but there is always a chance that you can justify and explain your cirumustances and if again it didinot work , you can say god knows why am i passing through that , surely it's gona turn to be a blessing maybe not now but later .. but the problem in some people is that if they felt such a failure , they want everyone to have that kind of failure to feel more satisfied about themselves ,, but why dont you lead them and try telling them your failures and so they dont do them and move on ... believe me more successful people in life are the ones who failed once and twice because they are more aware of their weaknesses and that makes them able to move on .. they do try to get all the keyes that make them successfull and that based on life experience .. Try many times, fail once and twice , then you'll reach your goal ..

P.S: Never Discourage people to make a progress, because you'll face an obstacle that makes you never pregress ..

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Monday, 12 March 2007

Gettings things off my chest !

Gd morning,

I really need to get things off my chest and mind ...

I've been thinking

a lot lately of so many things that just damaged me mentally and physically and made me reach a point that i dont need anything but relaxing , sleeping not thinking ... When i was little, i was always thinking that if you treat people nicely, you'll get the same treatment in return and i've been raised having that thought never changed .. when i got older i realized how people return your niceness with nastiness, how they talk about your troubles with winks and smiles while you are so pained, how they take your trust for granted .. Then, when a situation happen and you arrest them gossiping and you show them how hypocrites they are, they feel guilty and sorry .. huh

"after what" .. after they broke your heart and wiped all the feelings you have for them .. Those people,you call them people, they never deserve to reach the level of being friends .. when jealously and dishonesty get into any relationship whether it's work, college, school or any it just ruin it because who took you for granted once, can make it several times ..

sometimes i feel like tired form writing techniques and how , how how you should be and how distrust is awfual and and .. but few who follow , few who take these issues seriously .... Does that make me sound pessimistic :P

At the end, we should really cross out every situation we go through, label it with "History" and list all the lessons we learnt, it's not wrong to be put in a hardship but it's wrong when we dont learn any lessons from it ...

Hav a nice Day = )

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Wednesday, 7 March 2007

A harsh Unexpected accident !

Hi all,
I know i haven't blog for a while but i did miss all of ya "big time" ...
The past week was somehow painful to me because i just knew that i have to redo one of my modules at the university, ya right that we should always be thankful but i cannot deny the fact that i spent days and days and a big time studying and finishing all the projects of that module , i do have the right to tear or just say i am upset , dont i ?
anyways, .. Today i woke up feeling so broken and didnot really feel like going to work, it's like i had that gut feeling that something wrong is gona happen and it's like someone telling me , just be careful today ... i was wondering why , then i just thought maybe coz i am worried about my sister because she always speeds up , so i just sent her a message to be careful and take care ....... 5 minutes later , and i had an accidnet that just damaged me emotionally and somehow physically ~ god it was like three or fours cars , but my car case was the worse because i could barely drive it ..... el7mdella and thank god that i didnot get hurt much, it's only the pain of the shock that made me feel somehow tired ..

P.S: Read ad3ia, put your belts on, slow down, keep a distance and drive safely ...

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