TorturedLadydxb

Tuesday 27 November 2007

Terrible Fall !

Horrible scream, pain, dizziness, crowd and continued tears were all played after one fall. I had the worst fall ever yesterday night which made me unable to move and thankfully it wasn’t risky after I got checked up by x-ray. I did not imagine that I’d be released from the hospital. I slipped and fell so hard down 4 stairs on my back. I already fell one week back which made this fall more painful, since I was in the recovery phase. The pain was too bad to the extent that it made me shiver until I reached the hospital. Once I’ve been put on the wheelchair and entered into the hospital, millions of thoughts came in mind and I just wanted all my beloved to surround me, nothing more.

I started to repeat the prayers inside my heart, asked Allah to make this pain less severe and go away. I just remembered the accident my mom and I had in 2000 where my mom had some parts broken and it took her 3 years to recover, it was so tragedy. I know it’s irrelevant but I just thought of it. I started to say inside my heart “God, hopefully nothing is broken”.
The doctor diagnosed me and asked the nurses to get my back x-rayed. Holding my mom’s hand so hard, calling my beloved and pleading them to be so close with tears rolling on my cheeks. Waiting waiting waiting for the result, every minute was like a year.

Finally the doctor told me that the x-ray shows that nothing is serious and he told me that this is only a bruise on my tailbone and within one week, I’ll be fine. After getting the injection, I’ve been a bit able to take the pain and sleep. I reached home at almost 4:00 am which made me so demanding to go into a very deep slumber. I always minimize the number of tablets when I get them from the hospital but this time, I couldn’t use my bad habit with this pain. It’s like I am so punctual to get the painkiller on time.

P.S: sorry for making you so scared, I wouldn’t be able to feel good if u were not with me. Love u.

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Tuesday 20 November 2007

~ No Time

We usually repeat the word ‘no time’ to people ears every now and then because of our ritual hectic routines and full long schedule as we always state. The word ‘no time’ became a label that we stick it on every single day. It became like saying ‘hi’ or ‘goodbye’. For Muslims, it’s like saying “salam 3laikum”. “How’s Mr. No time”. “Ya don’t worry he’s been added to my calendar.
Well for me, today was like running in a loop that has no end. Going out of work, then university, attending the class where the listening session starts. In this session you should just listen, listen, listen and you must be extremely focused not sending messages, talking or doing anything else. It’s crazy.

~ Driving to home ..

From the amount of gained knowledge, you feel that your brain is aching, and you don’t really feel like listening to a single word when you are back home, otherwise you’ll be turned to be monster. It makes you say god why am I so busy? What am I building with my current lifestyle? Is that future costing me my present? I cannot accept any request, invitation or any which makes me so angry on myself. But again I go back hold my horses and calm myself that TL you should bare with that, as the saying goes “after every hardship comes ease”.

When I was out of university, I wanted to fuel myself with a lovely conversation with my bestie which always makes me feel so good. Listening to my siblings requests which I hate :P and that until I reach home.

Every busy person who always has ‘no time’, should streamline his/her life because without finding a way, definitely reaching your goal would be difficult.
This means we should focus on the necessary things and overlook stuff that can consume our energy for nothing. “Pick carefully who and what you let into your life”. Try to reduce the time you spend online playing or surfing pages while you have deadlines or other important stuff to catch up with. Eliminating one of your unnecessary habits creates more energy for you to apply the needed changes.

Good night

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Thursday 8 November 2007

speaking my mind

Life is full of cruel, good and bad people and from the exposure you have with certain people in life, you become more aware of what quality they are. Definitely, you’ll realize in later stages what each person wanted or aimed at from their relationship with you. It aches you and it might make you feel chaos from the inside and sometimes it makes you shocked but you try to overlook that because anyways they are “People” in your life. People come, people go. For sure, I cannot judge a person in my life fairly unless I spent with him/her a very long duration. So here come the situations where you’ll understand if that person really deserves your attention even a quarter.

When you get a repetitive treatment from some of your friends, colleagues, family relatives, or family this makes you say definitely there is something wrong with me. I realized that we mostly blame ourselves for others obnoxious behavior. It’s their bad not ours.
Niceness what I thought is the best way of behaving and it makes others respect you fully. But unluckily niceness becomes a trigger of crudeness, lies, disrespect and many, you just name them. I won’t say we should be rude with others but I’ll say we should be nice and strict at the same time. Some people you can feel the tradition of respect in their blood and others you can feel the rudeness and the sophistication structured in their brain to the extent that you wonder how they reached that level of education or position. What a steel brain, a phrase that will ring in your ears whenever you deal with them.

Some of that kind of people love playing the wisdom or caring role where they start showing others how intellect or social being they are. But when you look at them in the eye, you can sense the amount of stupidity and lies because at the end they are acting to be the opposite. And if you face them, they try to make a fool of you. Surprisingly, they have a way that I can call a “disaster”, they keep convincing you of what they think and in their perspective you must be convinced. I call them “Mrs. Or Miss or Mr. has an opinion on everything thing”.

They begin to talk about people’s weaknesses, listing the minor ones and they never observe the major weaknesses they have. “We start to curse the life, and the curse is us”, a poem meaning that we start criticizing others and list their weaknesses, and we already have most of these weaknesses. “Give everything in your life the right amount”, and I have no disagreement on that. Give your surrounding only and only the amount they deserve. Nothing more and nothing less, and I can call that a golden rule that should be highlighted and followed in life.

some pics to share :)

baby Khalifa , cousin

Good Night :)

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