Friday, 23 March 2007
Anger !
Gd' Morning ,
'We're an angrier nation nowadays', we cannot stand any situation no matter how big or small it is and we just find ourselves fuming at anything. Even if we encountered a little annoyance, we'll start screaming and swearing face-to-face or over the phone and the moment we put the phone down or just leave that person, we start feeling guilty AND WHY IS THAT? because we are short tempered and we cannot control it.
Never write a message while you are angry, because your angry mood is what telling you what to write, it's not you. This can really create a huge fight rather than calming it down.
'An angry person believes they must always have their way. When they don't get it, this leads to frustration' and from this comes the irrational notion because they feel that the other person is to blame for not letting them getting their way.
Some people think of it as an invasion of a space, like if you are seated alone and someone comes or phoned, your temper started to flare because you have the idea that they are pushing you, but they certainly didnot. This is because you think that the world is all about you and so if anyone interruputs that means they are pushing you. It's obvious that your belief system makes you interpret it that way. We really should not use anger as the best way for defence and try not to attach the pride in anger. like " i am not the kind of person who you shout talk to that way, you'll never get away with it" ... try just to use anger approriately and life is going to run smoothly.
Here are some tips that can help:
1) Try to change the way you think when you are angry, no one is responsible for your anger but you. We always link losing control with anger but it dosesn't have to be that way, you can get control of it by having rational thoughts.
2) Everyone has their own ideas and feelings , so it shouldn't be always your way. instead of you reacting on every word they say, try to listen carefully and respond nicely. have some tolerance that can make you more able to think why your partner is saying that and basically what the underlying cause of making him/her saying that.
3) If you have lost your temper, apologize in a sincere way and try to ask your partner of their point of view and so you can solve the problem rahter than creating a huge fight that might never end.
Have a nice lovely day full of calmness =)
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